Colorific! (Running Still Sucks)


The Color Run came to Kansas City! In this 5k run, volunteers hurl eatable, but bitter-tasting colored powder at the white-clad runners at the completion of each kilometer. Although their website never explicitly stated it, I had a feeling that arriving at the finish line in Technicolor would make the running part slightly more bearable. Somewhat True.

The fun started before 6 AM, when I rolled out of bed and threw on clothes picked out the night before. In my early-morning stupor, I decided to sport my pink, heart-shaped sunglasses and teal earrings. Because if you’re going to sweat your ass off and get pelted with colored powder, you might as well look good while doing it. Oh, the stupid things my brain thinks of before coffee.

So Fresh & So Clean at the starting line

We arrived at Arrowhead Stadium in our pristine white shirts before 7 AM. Along with 12,000 other people. We waited in line for the bathroom. We waited in line for the race. We got remarkably good at weaseling our way forward and sneaking through spaces in the fence waiting patiently in line.

After an eternity of waiting not-so-serenely, waves of 1,000 people were released every 5 minutes. After a short dance break, which involved my friends and I breaking it down while everyone stared at us in horror, we were off!

The heat attacked first. Followed closely by yellow-powder-wielding volunteers. Orange was accompanied by blaring oldies music. The blue people did not mess around. No little squeeze bottles for them. Powder straight from 5-gallon buckets. The pink station billowed under a bridge. There was so much powder on the ground, people literally rolled in it.

Smurfs don’t kid about color

At the end of the race, finishers gathered for the color throw. Everyone opened their individual color packets and threw them into the air simultaneously in a rainbow colorgasm of awesomeness. I almost collapsed from the shock wave of clichéd warm-fuzzy feeling emanating from the singular location.

As for color attacks distracting me from the awfulness of running, it sort of worked a little bit. Running still sucks. The sun beat down, and sweat streamed down my face and back. My knees and glutes ached. But since I am part magpie, brightly colored objects magnetize me, and events that encourage people to dress in costume always bring out the freaks provide prime people-watching opportunities.

Plus, I completed 5k in 30 minutes, 5 seconds. Not bad, considering I haven’t ran in at least 3 weeks.

Also, a huge thank you to my friend Willow, who bravely documented our Color Run experience in photographs because I was too chicken to bring my camera through the course!

Ever tried a Color Run or other gimmicky activity to distract you from the awfulness of working out? Ever wonder why races have to start so stinkin’ early in the morning?


9 Comments on “Colorific! (Running Still Sucks)

  1. before I was (burdened) delighted with children I did the Tinman Triathalon. It was grueling, I’ll take child birth any time!!

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