Seaweed Snacks: Nature’s Tissue Paper

Last week I wandered ravenously innocently through the grocery store, when my eyes lighted on this little gem:

I thought to myself, “self, you don’t have anything to blog about next week expand your culinary horizons and sample this exotic quinine.” I had no idea what to expect. I had never even seen food made of seaweed, much less eaten any.

I took the weird new food home and examined the entire package before opening it.

Serving Size 10 Sheets. Sheets? What kind of food is measured in sheets?!

30 Calories per serving. That makes 3 calories per sheet, and 60 calories in the entire package. That means even if I shove the entire package down my throat overindulge, I can’t feel guilty!

Ingredients: Seaweed, canola oil, sesame oil, salt. Only 4 ingredients, and I know what all those things are.

Go ahead. Indulge. Your friends will have culture envy. Just what I’ve never given a crap about always wanted. Why am I sitting around reading the package when I could be stuffing my face and making my friends jealous of my worldly Target purchase?

I ripped open the package and discovered that I had bought a pack of tiny, green, shiny, tissue paper pieces. I stared at them, obtained photographic evidence, accidently dropped half of them on the floor, worked up courage to try one, and stared some more.

tissue paper… yummmm

They smelled faintly of the ocean. I placed one of the sheets on my tongue and it melted, tasting like salt and seaweed. Since I’ve never eaten seaweed before, I’m entirely guessing the second flavor. The sheets made a crinkling sound as I pushed them into my mouth, giving me the distinct impression I was, indeed, ingesting tissue paper.

The picky knows-what-he-likes husband refused to even try them, based solely on their green, papery appearance.

Overall, the “seaweed snacks” tasted bland. Not exciting enough to warrant a second purchase. I also do not recommend eating these snacks before exercising, unless you enjoy seaweed-flavored belches.

Also in package: not for eating!
(darn)

Have you ever eaten something made from/with seaweed? What did you think? Any other unusual dishes I should try out?

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12 Comments on “Seaweed Snacks: Nature’s Tissue Paper

  1. Wow, this is hilarious! I also loved loved your cross-outs! So glad you led me back to your blog! I have eaten seaweed, but mainly in sushi where you notice it less because it’s just a wrapper. My sister and I used to refer to the seaweed that holds together sushi rolls as “electrical tape.” I’m sure there is a goldmine of weird edibles available in the animal innards department, but I’m not sure where your limits are. Animal innards definitely crosses the line for me. If not for you, have you tried tripe?

  2. Here is Asia they sell seaweed snacks on every corner like potato chips. The best ones are chili or wasabi flavors. The original flavor is never as good. I would like to say that’s there weirdest thing I have eating in my time in Asia, but its not even close.

    • No wonder the Asians are slimmer than Americans. They eat seaweed snacks instead of potato chips! Genius!

      Well, the experts have spoken. I will have to try the wasabi flavor and report back. And I bet Asia has tons of food considered “weird” by western standards.

      • You mean “weird” like kitty, puppy & monkey?
        Oh and bugs! Ooh gawdd.
        I once tried a healthful blended drink that was mostly water, a certain seaweed and peppermint oil. Slimy & a little gag-i-fied, but healthful.

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